If you ever wondered what the minimum amount of work you need to do to officially go down in the history books of the art world, I strongly advise you checkout William S. Elwell.

Son of a “highly regarded cabinetmaker” (whatever that means), William was born in Massachusetts and lived during that unique era of the 1800’s when America was just starting to find its feet. When he turned 21, he went off to study under the famed american painter Chester Harding, from whom he would learn to create portraits. From there, he would head off and become a clerk in D.C. and paint a number of important people in that city.

And that is more or less the high point of his story. I am not kidding. Beyond living the oddly rare life of a mediocre but profitable artists there is nearly nothing interesting to say about Elwell. His most famous portrait was one of Dolly Madison, the wife of James Madison, however he painted it nearly thirty years after the former president had finished his term, and well after the man had died. His second most famous work was a copy of a Gilbert Stuart’s famed portrait of George Washington. He isn’t even the most famous William Elwell, as there is a Fredrick William Elwell who, while not being that much more famous, at least has a Wikipedia page.

But while his existence might seem rather banal, taken as a whole William seemed to lived a well rounded life. In addition to being a painter, William was married twice, respected by his community, and found a church that let him play his clarinet on Sundays. And of course, while you may have never heard of his work, he does happen to have one portrait hanging in the Smithsonian National Portrait Gallery, which is certainly more than I can say for myself.