Egon Schiele loved vaginas. Unfortunately, most of the old fogies in the late 19th century did not. 

This is a totally classic Schiele nude. We’ve got the black stockings, the languid pose, the slightly elongated form, and the full bush. That her nipples almost match her lipstick is definitely an added plus. 

We really appreciate Egon’s clear reverence for the female form. In an age in which artists only painted women on their sides or focused primarily on soft, sensual portrayals of female butts (shout out to the booty), Egon was going straight for the big guns. He even got driven out of his ancestral hometown and thrown into prison, all for the sake of vaginas.

Women are mostly supposed to pretend that vaginas are gross, so I think somewhere deep inside his stocking obsessed, minor-seducing consciousness Egon was trying to help us out. His portraits were both erotic and unabashedly elegant, striking a balance that his contemporaries could (and would) not. These portraits are not gross. Because vaginas are not gross. They’re actually pretty dang cool and Egon totally knew it.

We’re hoping that this isn’t one of Egon Schiele’s favorite underage models, like seventeen year old Walburga Neuzil. But despite Schiele’s alleged pedophilia, he gained significant support and mentorship from fellow artist Gustav Klimt. Perhaps Wally had something to do with it-- she was at one point a mistress of and model for both painters. In the weird words of Sigmund Freud,“It may well be asked whether an attribution of 'degeneracy' is of any value or adds anything to our knowledge." But seriously, hands off the children, boys.